How To Not Let Drama Control Your Work and Life
Dealing with others’ need for drama in a healthy way
Drama is one of the biggest stress inducers, yet millions of people embrace it — some even look for it — daily. Don’t believe me? Just open your favorite social media network and start reading.
After declaring 2021 as the year of self, I dug deeper to keep the resolutions I set. Nothing sticks out more prominently than the quest to experience less drama.
While at home, at work, and out with friends, triggers surround us. How we deal with it is dependent upon our personality type. Ignoring one’s need for drama (NFD) comes easily to some; my husband has never lent others’ issues any weight. For others, denying it is a learned trait.
For years, I was the one who didn’t hesitate to soak up drama kings’ and queens’ stories, hoping to find a way to help. But since committing to putting myself first, I’ve been finding ways to work around others’ bursting needs for attention.
The need to create or inject oneself in drama cannot always be defined merely as a personality flaw. It may stem from histrionic personality disorder (HPD), which empowers sufferers to use superior social skills to manipulate others. People with HPD experience an intense desire to be noticed and will often act inappropriately to gain attention.
The exact cause of HPD isn’t known but, according to the Cleveland Clinic, the consensus is “both learned and inherited factors play a role in its development.”
HPD often affects professional and personal relationships due to swift mood shifts, seductive behavior, and gullibility. Someone with HPD may act as if they’re performing on a stage — dramatically with a lack of sincerity. They also tend to make rash decisions and abandon unfinished projects out of boredom.
The difference between HPD and NFD is consistency. People with HPD often exhibit symptoms continuously, regardless of their environment. They cross the line when it comes to theatrics and emotion. A mere drama queen is expressive, but not to the point of needing to stand center stage to survive.
